Another Reason to Avoid 10:10 Parties

I thought I saw a badger fight
   a brawny, fierce baboon;
their teeth were bright in silver light
   reflected from the moon.

The cunning badger hassled well,
   the ape’s defeat was near;
the ground was ruddied by his blood,
   it whimpered now in fear.

The badger ceased its frenzied strikes,
   and struck a pose instead:
“The Climate-Gate Enquiry’s great,
   you’ll now concede,” it said.

I rubbed red eyes in wild surmise,
   the truth now clear to me:
two drunken warmist loons I saw,
   debating with a tree.

(Originally posted at Bishop Hill’s site.)


3 Comments to “Another Reason to Avoid 10:10 Parties”

  1. That Barry Baboon and Badger McCain
    insist on scrapping and snapping again.
    —“You may have muscles, but you can’t explain!”
    —“You cannot reason for you have no brain!”
    Poor Barry Baboon, poor Badger McCain;
    neither has muscles, and neither has brain.

  2. The poster who began the thread, at Bishop Hill, “The all important question” (which was “who would win in a fight, baboon or badger?”), has criticised my light verse, saying, “I found some of the rhyming a little clumsy, and the timbre didn’t always work for me, but overall, an excellent effort. 8/10.”
    I responded:

    I know that some pronounce “enough”
    to rhyme with “though” or “bough”, not “rough”,
    and Smollet sometimes spelled a “though”
    as “tho’” for high-born, “thoff” for low.
    My rhyming to a foreign ear
    may seem, at times, as not quite near,
    and even in my native land
    some say “commahnd”, and some “commänd.”
    The PM here, you may have heard,
    of late has mispronounced a word;
    the press denounced her on the whole:
    “Hyperbolê, not hyper-bowl!”
    they shout, as if they elocute
    with perfect words and wit to boot.
    (My timbre may not be so great
    for Tassy is a timber-State.)

    I thank you, and appreciate,
    your thoughtful words, and score of eight.

  3. Another poster, BBD, complained: “Here in the UK the police are reporting badger attacks on sheds and outbuildings. While cynics claim this is simply a way of massaging the crime clear-up figures, I believe it is the literal truth.
    “The badgers are rising.
    “It’s worse than we thought.
    “And this thread – the only one of its kind – has been hijacked by people pretending to be poets.”
    I responded:

    The badgers are rising. It’s worse than we thought

       (for “poets” have hijacked this thread)
and nowhere is safe from the meline onslaught
       in any outbuilding or shed.

    What can an alarmed, or scared British bloke do
       that won’t need police or platoons?
The answer is easy, when reasoned right through:

       import a few dozen baboons.

    [Added later.]
    BBD asked whether the word “meline” pertained to mustelidae.
    I responded:

    I don’t mean the weasel family,
    but the badger particularly.
    “Meline” is derived, not just by me,
    from the Latin word maelês, you see,
    and it’s cited in the OED.

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